AYAHUASCA + BUFO ALVARIUS + ACCOMPANIMENT FROM THE HEART

Testimonial of a women that did her Inner Evolution process with her husband. First with Ayahuasca for three moons and then culminating with the Bufo Alvarius toad

“A few days ago, during the meditation, I saw this picture and I felt it represented me. That it was encoded with my exciting journey through Ayahuasca; with the sweet and demolishing impact from the toad; with your love and dedication; and also with my whole life from the moment of conception up to that instant in which I disintegrated in the immense Void of the Totality. And I was reborn. Or I woke up. What does it matter?! Who I was is no more, disappeared into nothingness to never return. And it doesn’t matter. It was only a collection of stories. I remain, infinity embracing the here and now. When I breathed again, a scream emerged from the bottom of my insides: “It’s me! It’s always been me!” And in that eternal instant I took hold of myself and accepted the challenge of being who I am, who I have always been, and who I will always be. I no longer need words, or thoughts, or to search for myself in others’ eyes. I do not need to sell or buy myself.

This acceptances keeps me in myself. I am one with myself. One with the immense void that contains everything, the entire universe lives in my womb. I ride between a thousand world simultaneously and nothing is true, nothing is fake, everything is illusion. And I feel the tremendous liberty of knowing myself to be an illusion! I cannot die because I have never truly been born! However, I am alive. I am life! A sigh of eternity suspended in the here and now.

That tiny and blessed instant when everything exploded, I chose to believe in myself. In myself as a woman. In myself as a medicine that contains all others. In myself as sweetness and serenity. In myself as love. And between laughs I am loving my present, myself, my only belief, my choice. I am the dark void in which every instant is born and dies and lives in the entire cosmos. For this and much more that cannot be contained by words, we offer this image that Joan painted some time ago. Even though I am conscious that the painting, the words, or any human creation cannot express the totality that lives inside me, the immensity that I am.”

Sara Fontsere